It Starts

Well, today was my first day of classes. I only had two, so it wasn’t too strenuous.

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At 10:00am I walked into Geography and sat down just as the professor began to speak. Thank goodness, because as he clearly pointed out to a wide-eyed latecomer later, he does NOT like tardies. Very strict as well. NO talking, eating, drinking, sleeping, flirting, or harassing. I mean, this guy covered all the bases. So much as breathe too loud and off with your head. But maybe he was just having a bad day. I guess we’ll find out.

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Then followed a two-hour break in which I came back to my dorm, exchanged books, and went to lunch before heading to Calculus at 1:00. Calculus…whimper, whimper… I have been told that I would be lucky to get a Calculus teacher who was actually from America or at very least spoke good English.

I was not so lucky.

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Professor Gorbounov. Sounds like something from Harry Potter. Professor walked into class, slapped down his syllabi on the table, placed his hands on his hips, looked around the room and said, in his perfect Dracula-impersonation, “Welcome to MA 113, Calculus 1.” He continued speaking and we discovered that Professor wasn’t impersonating anyone. I spent more of my time trying to translate what he was saying than comprehending what it meant.

Community bathrooms. Well, there’s something interesting.

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The showers are all in a row, with walls from ceiling to floor between them on three sides, and a curtain making up the fourth. I never did like the idea of a thin piece of plastic, hanging from sliding (SLIDING, mind you) hooks, separating me from the rest of the world. Anyway, cut into the bottom of the walls between each shower is a hole measuring about 4 inches tall by 8 inches wide. This is where the drain lies. One on each side of your shower. The floor is slanted in both directions from the middle of the shower towards each drain. I have learned one very important lesson already. Do not drop your soap. You will not see it again. Not unless you venture forth from behind your curtain to fetch it. Seeing as how the floor is slanted, dropping the soap would entail the soap zipping past the drain and into the next shower. Again, good-bye soap.

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Well, I suppose that’s about all for now. Tomorrow I have computer programming, english, and more calculus. Yes, I get the thrill of Count-Dracula and his formulas each and every day of the week. Imagine my excitement.

Hope you’ve enjoyed reading about my adventures and perils in this new world of college. Next time, laundry! How fun!

Your overworked, underslept student,
Josh

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