Saving Lives and Coping With the Guilt

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This past weekend I went on a camping trip Friday and Saturday with a group of guys from CSF. We went back to Red River Gorge, the same place my bible study group went last November. Needless to say, the weather was much nicer now and staying warm during the night was not a concern. Nothing all too exciting happened; just a normal camping trip, but it was fun to hang out with the guys.

Now, another chance for you to have a laugh at my expense.
That’s right, you should feel guilty.

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The other day I was walking back from the Corner Store to my dorm after buying some undoubtedly-healthy mini-pizzas (dough, pepperoni, cheese – that’s all part of the food pyramid, right?). The Corner Store, if you haven’t already guessed, is a small grocery store here on campus by the dorms.

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Anyway, I was walking towards the exit and noticed a table set up near the door, covered in flyers. This would be one of the local student organizations pleading for us to buy this, contribute to that, or sign up for a new Visa with jaw-dropping interest rates. I prepared an answer in my mind for whatever question they would throw at me: “No thanks.” Polite, yet short and to the point. I drew a deep breath and proceeded past the table. “Don’t make eye contact,” I reminded myself. “Walk like you’re on a mission. You don’t have time for these people and will not be bothered by their nagging.”

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At the last moment I noticed a sign on the front of the table that read, “UK Blood Drive.” The shock that this was for a good cause raced through my mind like a rampant locomotive, causing me to loose my cool and make eye contact with the lady sitting behind the table. Cunningly, she twisted the question around so as to arouse guilt within its victim, “Would you like to save a life next week?” As if in slow motion, my mind screaming, the answer was out of my mouth before I could stop myself, “No thanks.”

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“No, thanks, I don’t want to save any lives today. Let them die for all I care.” This was the equivalent of what I had just said. Guilt washed over me as I walked towards my dorm. I almost wanted to turn around, walk back to the table and explain myself to the woman, but did not. You see, I physically cannot give blood without getting sick. By sick I mean dizziness, passing out, and nearing the point of vomiting. Shots and needles do not bother me, but my body does not cope well with blood loss, which I would have gladly explained had I seen the Blood Drive sign just moments earlier. Yet I had not. Ah well, what’s done is done.

I laugh at the encounter looking back on it now. I suppose every once in a while we’re just bound to put our foot in our mouth.

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